I sleep better without my hearing aids. Although the house may be dead silent, I still hear sounds – whether that’s air particles colliding, who knows. But without them, I’m in a soundless black hole. For fifteen years, I’ve been wearing hearing aids and as a result, I struggled to differentiate the sounds “P” and “B,” half-step tones on the piano, and understand French recordings in class. I recently had an experience during dance practice where my hearing, my lifeline, fell out, and stopped working. Over the past few days, while wearing my old hearing aid until my new one comes in, I couldn’t help but reminisce our class’ lively discussion about Wendell Berry.
Berry’s pledge to never buy a computer was much discussed in class, including whether he meant the kind of computer I’m currently typing this on, or the kind that’s inside every piece of technology that exists, from the phone I keep checking every minute, to the machine that popped the Yates Mill Caramel Popcorn I’m devouring. Considering the latter, what would Wendell Berry do if he had to wear hearing aids?
Berry refuses to buy a computer as he feels that it would replace his wife, who provides “an association that [he is] dependent upon and that [he] treasure[s].” Moreover, he believes that one can’t “write conscientiously against the rape of nature,” and that the purchase of a computer doesn’t bring him closer to what matters most: “peace, economic justice, ecological health, political honesty, family and community stability, good work.” First, if I had a personal lifelong ASL interpreter, whom I possibly came to form a bond and connection with, in addition to paying them, would I enjoy having them follow me around everywhere? Does Berry’s wife follow behind him with a typewriter to record any and all thoughts he has throughout the day? Second, well I’ll have to agree with Wendell on this one as the mass production of hearing aid parts likely does contribute to “the rape of nature.” However the production of hearing aids for the 11+% of the US population that wears hearing aids is nowhere near the production of computers for the 85+% household users, thus this brings us back to whether Berry refused to use computers or all items consisting of computers. Third, my hearing aids have definitely brought me close to what matters most to Berry, especially economic justice, family and community stability, and good work. Without them, I would still be in a soundless black hole, unaware of anything going on around me. If I were to write a book with my hearing aids turned off, I would write about what comes to my mind, and maybe be inspired by something I see out of the corner of my eye. But with my hearing aids, I can have a conversation with those around me, sparking new ideas and connections. I can hear my surroundings whether that’s my keyboard clacking, the birds singing, or people talking. From these new stimuli and intersections, I can form new ideas and connections.
While my hearing aids have allowed me to verbally communicate with those around me, I’ve also learned skills to make up for the gap my hearing aids don’t cover. Having to rely heavily on sight, I realized I can learn a lot with just my eyes. The story of my life can be summed up by the pop culture meme: “When you’ve already asked ‘What?’ five times so you just nod and pretend to understand.” When I don’t clearly hear what someone says, while lip-reading, I look farther. I pay attention to their eye movement, the creases in their face, and the fidgeting of their fingers. These details can reveal what someone is paying attention to, how they smile, and their habits. As superficial as this seems, as I met and analyzed more people, I learned to connect these traits with personalities. So while I may not have constantly analyzed my surroundings without hearing aids, I did learn to better read those around me in response to what my hearing aids lacked in. My point is not that everyone should wear hearing aids to become more observant and understanding, but that technology can often indirectly create personal connections, past the computer or phone screen and into the people that use them.